


What Is Peri-Peri Sauce?

by hawkeyesbutt



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: #BANTER, Banter, LADS NIGHT OUT, M/M, No Homo, Parody, banter club, if they were english lads basically, lad culture is fuckin ridiculous i swear, this was so cringe to write oMG
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-12
Updated: 2015-05-12
Packaged: 2018-03-30 07:05:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3927433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hawkeyesbutt/pseuds/hawkeyesbutt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a rough practice sess, the lads are off for a cheeky Nandos before going out on the pull. Will Tanaka get absolutely wankered and end up chundering in a field? Who will be named the Arch Bishop of Banterbury by the end of the night? Will Hinata enjoy his first ever Nandos? And most importantly, will Kageyama ever understand what it is to be a lad?</p><p>#cheekynandos</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Is Peri-Peri Sauce?

**Author's Note:**

> im so sorry youre reading this

After a long harsh evening of volleyball practice, Kageyama wanted nothing more than to head home, take a shower and eat dinner. A measley curry bun wouldn't fill him up tonight; he had a hankering for something more. As he made his way out of the gates of school, he heard a yell from across the courtyard.

"Oi, wait up Kageyama!" Tanaka yelled, running over to him. The others followed at various paces, with Daichi and Suga walking the slowest at the back. "Where do you think you're going, you cheeky bugger?"

"Home?" Kageyama stated in confusion, his eyes wandering over the semi-excited faces of his teammates.

"You can't go home!" Nishinoya yelled, walking up to him. "It's Lad's Night tonight. You know what that means, don't you?"

"No?" Kageyama replied, still confused.

Nishinoya exchanged a look of dismay with Tanaka. Even Asahi was shaking his head at Kageyama's words. "It's _Lad's Night_. Going out on the pull with the lads, stopping off for a cheeky Nandos! Making Asahi buy us all alcohol so we can go get utterly bollocked in the park!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Kageyama asked, becoming wary of the wide grins on their faces.

"Kageyama," Hinata said, walking over. He took a deep breath, before looking up at him. "Will you come for a cheeky Nandos with us?"

 _Oh, I get it._ Kageyama thought. He'd definitely seen that restaurant in town before, not far from the shopping center. "You want to go to Nandos? Their food isn't even that good-"

"Whoa there!" Tanaka yelled, looking at him with disgust. "Keep your traitor words to yourself. Are you British or wot?"

"I'm Japanese, and so are all of you-"

"Whatever, you absolute cockmuncher. Are you coming for a cheeky Nandos or not?"

Kageyama considered. To be fair, he'd only been there a couple times. The food wasn't exactly bad, the thing is that it was just... All chicken. All that was on the menu was chicken and side dishes. Kageyama wasn't exactly a food snob, but you can't have a restaurant that just sells chicken. Or, as the case may be, you could. "Alright."

"Wheeeeeeey!" Nishinoya yelled, "None of that badmouthing Nandos talk ever again though, aight?"

Hinata beamed beside him, looking over at Tanaka. "I've never been for a Nandos before. What's it like?"

"Mate," Tanaka said, staring at him in disbelief. "Nandos is gonna blow your fucking roof."

"Can't we just go for a Maccie's?" Suga asked, causing the squad to glare in his direction. "I'm just saying... I'm not feeling a Nandos tonight. I'm pretty knackered after practice - I'm not in a cheeky enough mood."

"A bit of banter will get you through, Suga, I promise that." Daichi comforted him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Oh alright then," Suga agreed. "Get that hand off me though, you pillock. Do you want people to think I suck your cock?" 

As if he were burnt, Daichi's hand disappeared from Suga's shoulder in the blink of an eye. "Oh, ahaha," Daichi laughed nervously. "Of course not. No homo, man."

"You guys need to get a room," Asahi laughed, patting Suga on the back. "Oops, no homo, bro."

"No worries, after Daichi's touched me I've probably caught it by now," Suga teased.

"Whaaaaaaaay! Nice one, Suga!"

"So, we just go for a Nandos and that's it?" Kageyama asked. "What's 'cheeky' about going for a Nandos?"

"Mate, I swear to the Arch Bishop of Banterbury, if you don't quit it with the obvious questions we're gonna go get wankered without you." Kageyama remained silent. _Do I really want to be one of the lads if all we do is go for a Nandos, drink cheap beer and go out on the pull for birds we'll call ugly later?_ He thought. Alas, this decision wasn't up to him. It was too late, for he'd been accepted into the breast of the **Lad Community.** That most definitely didn't mean he'd be going on Facebook later to like the  LadBible page, that's for sure.

They finally arrived at Nandos. The banter was ready to ensue. Tanaka was already making bets on who'd end be the 'Absolute Ledge' by the end of the night, and who'd be the 'Bantersaurus Rex'. As they walked through the doors together, Kageyama felt his hand brush against Hinata's as they searched for an empty table. "Oh, sorr-"

"N-no homo!" Hinata all but yelled, causing a few customers to glance his way. Kageyama stared at him in confusion. Before he could say anything, they were being swept away to a booth.

**Author's Note:**

> i probably will not continue this because its fuCKING RIDICLOUS


End file.
